So, there’s a place for one-stop-shopping when planning a wedding. A Bridal Fair. It never ever occured to me that these things should be called wedding fairs. I went with Kelly and we scoured the place for caterers, florists, locations, limosines, tuxes, videographers, photographers, choreographers, etc.

The cheese factor at these events is quite high. Mostly ladies half my age, with their maids of honor and mothers. Heyyyy. Maybe that’s why they call them Bridal Fairs?

But, I figured my money was as good as anyones. Maybe BETTER – since I had so little of it.

So we strolled up the isles with our little bags. Stoping here. Stopping there. Accepting congratulations everywhere. “um. actually. it’s a two-groom ceremony. and. um. the other him isn’t here because it’s a surprise wedding”.

I can assure you, here in liberal Kolly-fornia nobody flinched at a two groom ceremony. It actually made us somewhat of a novelty and found people were even more helpful, perhaps. It was the surpise wedding part that created all the hubb-ubb.

So, yes, I explained. Yes. We’ve been together for over 16 years. So, no – it’s NOT likely he’ll say no. He better not say no. But, just in case, I started keeping tabs on how much this was going to cost. Because afterall, I’m happy to foot the bill for the biggest day of my life. But, if it turns out he decides this is all so sudden, and he’s not sure, or says no, then well – I can present him the bill for his “Birthday Party”.

So, like a moth to a flame, like a wolf to the moon, like a bee to a flower.. you get the picture.. I’m all.. OOOOOOO shiney things. Dresses.

DON’T WORRY. It’s not a drag wedding. But it was funny to dream for a moment. What would they say if I came down the isle wearing THAT..

well. they probably don’t have it my size anyway.