Before he’s even raised his hand to take the oath, it appears our President Elect is working at his reelection in 2012.

What other reasonable explanation could there be for his selection as invocation choice for the inaugural ceremony. Let me start by saying, I’m an Obama fan. I may even be willing to cut him some slack and set aside my concerns in this instance because what our country needs now more than anything – is unity.

That being said, choosing Rick Warren is certainly a bold choice, if not a dumb one. We’re talking about a mega-church pastor who has equated Gay marriage to incest.

I know – huh?

Certainly that must qualify as some sort of radical thinking – if not insanity. But, Obama’s reaching-out may be centered more on trying to bring evangelicals into his centrist fold rather than anything else. It is sort of a nod to the right wing to say “See! I’m really, really not a muslim – and it’d be alright if you moved on over to the center somewhat. And, come 2012, remember how I reached out to you. I’m not a liberal”.

Great. Good for you Mr. President elect. However – if you recall, none of Pastor Warren’s constituents were involved, worked hard, or contributed their dollars to get you the the position where you’ll get to waltz around the floor at your inaugural ball. Quite a large portion of your supporters who did, will be left outside in the cold, looking in the window.

As an admirer of political-posturing-done-well this may be a master stroke. Pastor Warren has much to benefit from this newly-cozy if not odd coupling. With the Reverend Billy Graham and the like moving off the scene – there’s no preeminent successor to carry the torch as the figure head of Christianity for sanctioned formal events.

What a great opportunity for the reverend to raise his stature among his followers, and lure in a whole new batch of converts to his mega-church by pointing to his move towards national prominence. Great. Hope he gets a new hummer out of it.

But, Mr. President-elect – you’re walking a fine line. If things don’t go very well in the coming years (and right now, things are so bad, you’re going to have to be a miracle worker to say the least) the first ones who will seek to throw you overboard to the minnows will be the followers of the good pastor himself. And, if you continue to make moves like this – which isolate, offend and otherwise disillusion the Gay community – I don’t know that you’ll be able to call on that constituency to throw you a life preserver NO MATTER HOW GOOD AN ORATOR you are or if you tap dance a jig better than Ben Vereen himself.

So, that being said – I’ll forgo this one. I’m cautiously optimistic. I’d like to see where you’re going with this one before I write you off as a bait-and-switch candidate who has taken the money of the Gay community, thrown in a few references to aknowledge our existence off stage, and then conveniently forget our existence now that our checks are cashed.

Oh. And a fucking appointment to your cabinet might not be out of the question either. How about that for balance?

Thanks.

I had a very nice time this year visiting friends in Houston.

It was a good time, but of course Rob was in California with our family – so that would have been nice too. I had used up my vacation in my surgery, so I wasn’t able to venture west this time.

But, I am looking forward to going that way in February.

It’s going to be great fun. In the meantime it’s getting cold here. Yesterday it was 77 degrees, today is like 57. Big drop! And, I’ll survive but I prefer the warm weather any day. Pictured above are friends I traveled from Austin with. Left to right, Shefonda, Resta, Jessica and FaLisha. We mostly stayed off each others nerves and some moments were more successful than others but remember, close quarters does that to even the best of friends right?

Looking forward to gettting the Christmas tree this weekend and starting a painting project in the next couple of weeks. I’m sure the house will look totally different!

Hello and greetings from Austin –> Christopher

It’s a cool evening. Uno kitten, ever the subtle one, sits staring at
the cold dark fireplace as if to say “Never mind me. Sure I have this
fur. I’m just old and cold, but – I’ll be OK”

Rob caves, of course, fireplace on.

Hope things are well with you and your family

C!

Well. It was nice to hear from friends and family today offering their condolences and sympathies for the passage of Proposition 8 in California. There are so many things to examine from this episode of a civil rights struggle that gains another chapter.

What’s most important, and what I need to reiterate as much for myself as for all of you is that we need not lose hope. Sure, it’s surprising – sometimes appalling to see the degree of bigotry which exists in America. Especially in, what most in our country view, as a liberal haven like California. But, witnessing ignorance or hatred, usually is just that – surprising and appalling.

Mostly because, as Americans, we don’t think of the people who live right next door to us as being capable of disliking us. You know, those folks who for the most part wave at us, or at least nod in our direction when we see each other getting into our cars in the morning. Each going to work. Each earning a living to pay our taxes. Each putting our pant legs on, one-at-a-time. You get the picture.

What bothered most of the people that I’ve spoken with over the last few months were the drives down the streets lined with signs proclaiming support for such a divisive proposition. It created hurt and dismay. Even my own Mother, God-Bless-her, was shocked that someone might take her NO on 8 bumper sticker. (No worries. She replaced it with one on the “inside” of the window. Not fearing someone breaking it, she reminded me that’s what insurance is for).

But, back to the “hope” part.

The struggle of course, is far from over. The cause of reason and justice can’t be deterred by a single event. And, in the big scheme of things, this is a single event.

If you look at the results of Proposition 22 just a few years ago and the results of this vote, it is clear that the sane is gaining ground. It is not possible for the irrational and unsubstantiated to last perpetually.

States like Massachusetts and the like will show America that it is simply unjust in the long run to treat people differently. And, for those who voted for 8, with the argument that civil unions are the same as marriage, thus – we should settle for this – you may be among the most misdirected. It is simply akin to telling a colored person of the 50’s that your fountain dispenses water, it will quench your thirst too – why must you drink from mine.

Demeaning a class of people can only last for a time. But, it’s important that we take this time to examine ourselves. Examine our strategies, and our goals. Let’s use this time to rethink our approach and our future.

Perhaps we expand our advocacy efforts to include repealing tax-exemption laws for “religious” institutions that are more aptly the equivalent to PAC’s. We will need to regroup, and reapproach our conscious awareness of our continued movement. Perhaps commemorating this set back as a day of reflection. Let’s move to make it a day off work. If not through formal holiday, a day of strike. And lets refocus this referendum as one on civil rights. Period. Yes, I’m Gay – but quite frankly as far as this discussion is concerned, that’s irrelevant.

Lastly once we find the votes in the future, hopefully not too distant future, and we bring this to the front of the political conversation again – let’s enlist a nationwide grass roots effort. Each of our LGBT brothers and sisters has as much to gain from this effort as Californians do. Finding a way to involve people from out of state, much like the Mormons and Catholics do can be an effective way to channel our broader energies and efforts from our extended communities.

And – then. Once we repeal this injustice, move to change the laws to require at least two thirds vote for any change to the State Constitution. This referendum should never have passed with a 51 or 52 percent vote. The constitution ought to be held as a document not to be easily changed with the whim of a political group bent on pushing their views on their neighbors. Speaking of neighbors – the next time yours asks to borrow your lawn mower, tell him “get off my fucking lawn i’ll chew your ass up with it!”.

Ok. that last part was just a little frustration venting. Go ahead and give it to them. Show them what a real neighbor should behave like.

Hugs from Texas. We love you all.

Hey. Well, I wanted to provide an update to those who inquire regularly. Thank you so much for your support.

I’m happy about the progress and when you ask, it makes me feel like you care too.

Also an Uno the Cat update. Our little kitty is better. He was out of it for about a week, and we thought we were going to lose him. He was just in one spot and not eating, drinking or going to the bathroom. His eyes were only half open so we set up a little spot for him so he could sleep. He seemed to like the little heating pad we set up (in fact, he’s better now but still hangs out on that pad!)

We cut up some chicken, his favorite and put that down next to him. Eventually he’d try and eat something and then drink some water and this lasted about several days but eventually he started crying again at 5am for chicken. Normally, this would NOT make me happy, but the first morning in over a week, where he cried for a 5am feeding, I was up and out of bed so fast! I was just so happy he was appearing to be heading back to normal.

He’s lost even more weight and is just hanging out on his heating pad most of the time, but it’s nice that he appears from most aspects his usual self.

Thanks to those that asked.

Election day is tomorrow! I’ll be hanging out at our friends John and Chris’ home so we can celebrate this historic moment together. It’ll be historic no matter how it turns out right? But we all know HOW it will turn out. I’m confident.

We’ll also be eyeing west to see how our family and friends are doing with Proposition 8. It is so sad really that folks insist on putting love as a constitutional referendum. I’m surprised by some folks stance on this issue who are sometimes considered in minority groups themselves. It was only 1969 that the last law in America which made it unlawful for peoples of two different races to marry. There was a time in this country where some were viewed as “property” and thus, had no ability to determine who they’d love or be able to marry. There was even a time when women had little say over matrimonial decisions.

To think of what I’ve been hearing in the media from some folks associated with these groups, it makes me shake my head. It’s beyone comprehension really. I hope that justice and common sense prevails. I think we’re seeing in the presidential election that the country is ready for change and healing – and I hope this sentiment extends to the California propositions where folks can say enough of the deviciveness. I hope it all goes well.

Dear Friends,

Most of you probably are already voting this season, NO on Proposition 8. As a new resident of Texas, I have no dog in this fight (as we say here in Tejas).

That, not entirely being true, I wanted to take this opportunity to convey the importance of this legislation to me and my family.

When Rob and I decided to marry in 2005, after already 16 years together, it was because we felt we wanted to share a momentous occasion with those closest to us. It was particularly important because we value our family and we know that they value us as well. This was an opportunity to acknowledge as an extended family all of our commitment to one another.

But, the legality of marriage is of the highest importance.

When I finished my service in the U.S. Navy after 12 years of service (8 active 4 reserve) and I returned home with 3 Good Conduct Medals (for being a good sailor), the National Defense Service Medal (for my service during the Gulf War), Coast Guard Meritorious Unit Commendation (for participating in what was at the time one of the largest domestic drug interdiction) and the one I’m most proud of the Navy Achievement Medal (the highest personal award presented for individual achievement) I expected Rob and I would settle down in my hometown of Sacramento and start a new life.

After living with years of opression, in the form of Don’t Ask-Don’t Tell, and undergoing some truly humiliating experiences in which I feared for my life and sanity – I just wanted to live a ‘normal’ civilian life. It was enlightening and disappointing though to see the discrimination on the inside of the military extends outside, just taking different forms.

When we found our dream home, we couldn’t get it because I couldn’t use my VA loan in the way a married couple can. We swallowed hard, let go of the dream of owning that home and settled on a condo that we could get. Not our ideal, but still our first home!

When trying to get homeowners insurance, we weren’t able to get the insurance discount offered other customers who have their home and cars jointly insured with the same company – because of our marital status. After waiving our arms and raising our voices, we finally convinced AAA to compromise. They gave us a conditional offer to extend the discount to a non-married couple. The condition was we registered each others cars in both our names (at the time, Rob had his, I had mine). When we approached GMAC they indicated we would need to pay a $250 application fee. This fee not required of married couples. For a married couple, you can simply add the spouses name to the loan. For non-married couple, it’s considered a separate application process. We forewent GMAC and refinanced the cars through the Credit Union.

The credit union however directed us to the California DMV to add each other to the titles of the cars. For married folks, this is simply an administrative process with no charge. For unmarried folks it is treated like the sale of a car. You have to pay a transfer fee and obtain a smog check.

Ok (sigh).

We went to take the car to get smogged and since they’d need it for several hours, we decided to cross the street and rent a car for the day. The lovely folks at Enterprise quoted me a rate different than the one being simultaneously quoted right next to me! The lovely lady explained that the couple next to us was married. In California there is an implied liability for married couples. For we non-married types, we would need to pay an additional driver fee.

Folks, if you’re straight – you may not be subjected to this treatment in America. So, you could be forgiven for not knowing it even exists. If you’re Gay and not in a relationship, you may also be unaware. Unless you’re a person who is confronted with this type of atmosphere regularly, you may be not be conscious about how pervasive discrimination extends throughout our society. The institution of marriage, whether you agree with Gay Marriage or not – carries the weight of law and as a result many of the benefits in our society – have been joined to it.

These benefits should not be refused to those who have no power to make the choice of entering into the institution.

You might argue that the purpose of marriage is for pro-creation, but not all married couples pro-create. You might argue that no church should be forced to perform a ceremony for people they don’t wish to recognize. Check. We’re in agreement there too.

So I guess if we remove some of those arguments, I’m still waiting for the one which makes moral and ethical sense. Isn’t it ironic that folks who might try and claim some moral high-road by claiming some religious or biblical foundation for their argument aren’t as rabidly opposing the invasive pop culture phenomena which degredate marriage like Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire, or Marry My Dad, or The Bachelor, or the Bachelorette, or fly-by-night-get-hitched-in-Vegas-by-Elvis operations, or prison marriages, or marriage-to-promote-citizenship-to-immigrants, or marriage between opposite sex for reasons other than love, or marriages because of teen pregnancy and your momma is running for Vice President, or any number of abuses of an ideal they claim to hold so sacred?

Is it any wonder that the Gay community looks at these folks with skepticism that they aren’t sincere?

Before I ramble myself into too much bandwidth. Let me just conclude with my sincere stand on this issue. Issuing a marriage license to two people soley on the basis of their gender – without any regard to any other criteria – is unjust. There’s no argument that you can convince me of which says that a veteran, such as I, who have contributed to the betterment of my community, has paid my taxes and have worked hard to improve my neighborhood and the quality of life where I live – is less qualified to enter into this state-sanctioned-institution than someone who has just committed murder, never paid a dime of taxes in his life, and who couldn’t even care about this argument because they never vote! Yet, they are entitled to a whole segment of entitlements, others are not.

If you can somehow reconcile your reasoning, please give me a non-demonational, pro-American, sane and reasonable explanation. Thank you.

Christopher Solis-Rough
Texas Resident

We had a great visit from our friend Kev and his compadres. We tooled around, and saw stuff. We ate tons, or as much as one can eat banded anyway. And, we danced, danced, danced. I had a great time and I’m sure everyone else did too. We tried some places I hadn’t yet, like Milaga’s a tapas restaurant where the meatballs were the best. Although that place was seriously loud. So great place to eat, but not necessarily the best for conversation.

http://www.youtube.com/get_player

I put together this video from the trip so we could see some fun pictures from a great weekend. We made it to the Oasis. That’s the place that looks out over lake Travis and Mom and Rocki when they came to visit really loved that place.

We had a small problem with the jeep the boys were driving, but after one tow truck call and a crammed backseat back to town, we were back in vacation mode again! We did have that small problem Saturday night with the Valet stand that closed before we retrieved the car resulting in.. no car! But my new friends from California put me up in their hotel so I didn’t have to walk from Downtown to North Austin. Quite a hike!

We sure enjoyed the Spider House and hanging out until the time for their departure came. Which was sorta sad, because I wanted the weekend to go on and on. But, I’m sure they’ll come back to visit again. There’s plenty of reasons, there’s so much to see and do – and believe it or not, we never made it to 6th street all weekend. Can’t believe it!

Through all that dancing and only attempted eating, I had another great weight-loss-weekend, tipping the scale this morning at a total weight loss thus far of 60 pounds. Wow.

I hope you’re all doing well and I look forward to seeing you all. Soon.

Watching the final debate this evening. I’m not seeing anything new. Well, maybe “Joe the Plumber” is new.

I think anyone who hasn’t made up their mind by now, is either brain dead or just fibbing.

As far as I’m concerned, let’s just hold the election now and be done with it. It can’t be my imagination that this is the longest election of all time. It’s like Christmas shopping. It’s starting earlier, earlier and earlier.

I don’t think we’re benefiting from this point. It seems like it’s just negative because there is no point in trying to outlay any new ideas this late in the cycle.

So, I’m tuning out. I have enough information to make a decision. So, if you’re one those people who says “oh, I just won’t know until I step into the booth” – God bless ya. I’m thinking what more information might you need??

I took this picture today because I was amazed that gas has finally come down some. I swear just 2 – 3 weeks ago it was like $1 more than this a gallon! How does that happen?

I hope you’re doing well. I’ve hit one of those plateaus in my weight loss. The needle hasn’t moved lately but I’m doing alright. Let me know how you’re doing!

I, like many of my friends, have become a Facebook junky. It’s become part of my semi daily routine. Just like checking my voicemail, checking my email, now I’ve added – checking my Facebook. It’s a great way to connect with friends and family. What are they up to? What is going on in their daily lives, let’s see their pictures. What are they doing right this minute? What is their status update? This one is at Starbucks – this one is feeling blue – this one is at work, and should be working – this one is climbing a mountain (which makes you wonder, why the hell would you be at the top of a mountain, trying to connect to facebook?!) (Insert laugh here). We all gave the person a hard time about that one.

When I was drinking, I’d often think well – I can’t have a probelm, because I’m not as bad as him or her! And, I find myself doing the same thing. I would never climb to the top of a mountain, and rather than taking in the view, hope that I could get an internet connection so I could announce to the world that in this moment I feel happy. Not that I’m at the top of a mountain, but that I could connect to Facebook.

But now, for those of you who are Facebookers too, you know it’s not just about the collection of updates and peeks into what folks are up to. There’s all these applications which run on Facebook and I can play scrabble-word scraper-scrabulous with one group, race cars online with another group, and send birthday cards, receive little daily well wishes, and Ouch! I just got poked!

If you’re wondering if this writing will be a litany – or railing on the evils of Facebook – think again! I’m in the middle of my addiction! I don’t have a problem.

Oh and I just beat my friend Eddie (aka Emma) in Word Scraper. She’s one of the most linguistically intellegent friends I have who traditionally kicks my ass from one end of the block to the other. But on this day I achieved a monumental victory. No, I didn’t lose a hundred pounds (yet), no – I’m not counquering a mountain top, nor did I discover a cure for the common cold..

I BEAT EDDIE IN A GAME OF WORD SCRAPER – LIFE IS GREAT!

I even took a picture of the screen to prove that it actually happened. I hope you’re as happy for me as I would if you’d discovered I had just won the lottery. Because I may not ever do that but I did this.

Ok. I can go back to trying to be humble again. Thanks for indulging me in this gloating commercial.

Hey all. Well, it’s time to update on the weight loss. It’s been going smooth and steady. It averages to about 2 pounds per week, which is what the Dr. said was an expected and healthy rate. I was skeptical as some weeks there’s very little change, and then others it drops faster.

You can click on the graph to see it larger. But, I’m glad there is less nausea.

I’m thinking I’ll have to buy some new clothes soon. Yes – I’ve been wearing my old clothes. Mostly because you know, I’m frugal that way and hate the thought of spending money on a size that I might zoom past makes me clutch my dollars harder.

But, folks at work have commented that my clothes are a little loose fitting. I take it as a compliment most times and say “thanks”. But, then the other day I was walking by a mirror at work and was appalled. It was total clown-hobo look. I couldn’t believe my pants were cinched up by a belt that was on the smallest hole, and a shirt that was hanging loose everywhere.

I was shocked and then laughed and then went back to shocked. So, I guess I’ll have to buck up and buy a new outfit or two. Maybe I’ll buy tight and hope to grow into it. I supposed that’s the converse of my weight gain days when I would buy just a little loose with the sub-conscience thought that I might gain weight and then they wouldn’t fit if they were too snug.

So, all is going good. I’m going to a support group. I went to my first clothing trade, but there was no men there, and I think my co workers would rather see me in my current baggy clothes, than a flowery dress that fits. Everyone has continued to be supportive. I had a birthday last week and the tradition of our workplace is that you get taken to lunch, but instead my coworkers gave me a beautiful bouquet of flowers. That was thoughtful of them.

Let me know how you’re doing. Especially if I haven’t heard from you in a while.